Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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