You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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