Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
