You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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