It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
