And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize