are you still at the devil's house?
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
