So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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