You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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