He is such a slut. More and more my type.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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