are you so shy because you have an std?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
