he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
