the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
