I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
