So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
