I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
