thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
