hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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