Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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