the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize