discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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