I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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