Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize
