yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
What drink are we having for lunch?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
