That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
