What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
