I CAN MOONWALK!
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
