My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
