no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
