He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Randomize
