The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
