I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
