Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
