that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
