If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
