Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
