Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
