am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize