Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
dude. I can hear the air.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
