i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
