My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
