Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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