Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
