It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Cover your peen. We're going out.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
