i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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