So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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