Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
