mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize