Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
it's like heaven, but drunker
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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