i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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